The Green Party might be about to win their first ever parliamentary by-election. Gorton and Denton is covered in fluorescent green posters. Their candidate Hannah Spencer is apparently "plain-speaking."

Let's take her at her word and have a plain-speaking look at what the Greens actually want to do if they get power.

LEGALISE ALL DRUGS

Not just weed. All of them. The Greens want supervised drug consumption rooms and the decriminalisation of personal use for everything including heroin. Their manifesto talks about treating addiction as a "health issue" rather than a criminal one.

Lovely sentiment. Completely detached from reality. Ask anyone who lives near a methadone clinic how well the "compassionate approach" is working.

BAN BADGER CULLS

Bovine tuberculosis costs farmers a fortune. Culling infected badgers in problem areas helps control the spread. The scientific evidence is mixed but farmers in high-risk zones support it because they see results.

The Greens want an immediate ban. The badgers, apparently, are more important than the farming industry.

WEALTH TAX

1% on assets over £10 million. 2% on assets over £1 billion. Sounds lovely. Soak the rich.

Except every country that's tried this has discovered the same thing: rich people have accountants. And passports. France tried it. The millionaires left. Sweden tried it. The millionaires left. The Greens think Britain will be different because... reasons.

Meanwhile, the "merely affluent" get caught in the net. Your nan sitting on a house that's gone up in value. Small business owners who've built something over decades. They can't afford to leave. They just get squeezed.

AND THEY MIGHT ACTUALLY WIN

That's the terrifying bit. Gorton and Denton is there for the taking. Labour's vote is collapsing. Reform is splitting the right. And in walks the Green Party with their legal heroin and their protected badgers.

This is what happens when the mainstream parties abandon common sense. The fringe fills the gap.